My oldest, Macy, starts kindergarten later this week. And, I guess I kind of feel like I’m losing her. The process of losing has begun, at any rate. Other people will be feeding her mind, and most importantly, her soul. And I won’t be there to keep the bullies away, or to persuade her not to become one. I won’t be there when a teacher misspeaks, and damages her worth. I won’t be there to guard this precious girl, with so much attitude, but yet SO very tender. Parents spend their whole lives feeling a little more helpless with each year of their child’s life. Well, I’m not ready to start saying goodbye to my baby girl!
Fears of all the heartache that inevitably awaits her is gripping me a little this week. I used to work for children and youth services, so I have firsthand knowledge of just how evil this world truly is. If I could put her and me in a bubble right now, I would! And we’d go bouncing off somewhere nice and safe….
I also know that each pain she experiences can be used for her good and for God’s glory. No, I’m not homeschooling my daughter, but in a sense, I will be. At HOME, I will have to help her make sense of each situation that puzzles or pains her. At HOME, I will have to teach her how to forgive, how to be gentle. At HOME, I will have to teach her to be courageous, and to be a light in this dark, dark world.
Please pray for me and others who begin saying goodbye to their babies…that we would have wisdom for all the many difficult questions….patience to lovingly deal with their big and small mistakes…and for peace, as we leave them in God’s ever-loving hands. He is, after all, the One who lent them to us for awhile.
This reminds me of one of the verses of a pretty famous song, “Because He Lives”:
How sweet to hold a new born baby
And feel the pride And joy he gives
But better still The calm assurance
That child can face uncertain days because he lives!
Oh, if you want to have a weep fest with me, listen to the following song!