Most of you know, I had my fifth stroke last week. It was pretty boring…much like the other four. Blah, blah, blah. But this one left me with little to no strength in my left leg, so that it was like lifting iron every time I tried to move it. So, last Thursday, I had to get a cane. Now, those who know me know that I’d sworn I would never be reduced to using a walker or a cane. And here I was.
I would have said before Thursday, that I had had my pride pretty much destroyed by all the other strokes and struggles in the last two years. But I was sooo wrong! This really did me in. And it wasn’t that I was upset because of what others might think or say. It was the fact that, to me, using a cane was somehow saying that the stroke had beaten me. And I just didn’t want that to be true or to even feel true to me. It was a very difficult day .
So, in an effort to try to cheer me up, even though I was awful to him all week, my husband suggested we go to this small airport, because he’d heard they were giving free plane rides. FREE PLANE RIDES????? Just those three little words had me feeling like a dog who was just offered bacon! That had always been one of those dreams I’d always had for forever. I was so psyched!
We got to the airport and found out they were still giving rides, so an older gentleman, sizing up me and my cane, took us over to the plane. He was scratching his head, trying to figure out how they’d get me into the cockpit. But I somehow scurried myself into that plane so fast, he was still scratching and I was already buckled up! You couldn’t KEEP me from that plane.
Before you knew it, we were flying! It was so beautiful…the deep green of the valleys, the mountains sparkling from the sun. It looked like a cross between a patchwork quilt and a really large golf course! And off in the distance, the pilot informed me that the dark sky was a storm in progress, and I even saw lightning bolts! It was all so beautiful..just the way I’d always imagined it would be. The clouds were so close, while we flew in and out of them. I didn’t even hear all of the noise of the plane. It was perfectly silent, and all I could focus on was God’s splendor all around me!
Just then, a verse I didn’t remember having known, popped into my head.
“The lowly, He sets in high places…”
Do I have an awesome God, or what???? He took me in my lowest state, and lifted me higher than I have ever been!! He really loves me!! I know some people would have five strokes and might begin to doubt His love. But He keeps making it more real and more tangible every day!!!!
He loved me enough to give me that awesome experience of the heights of His love…and He loved me enough to set me down low, too.